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Benefits in Daily Life

Life often places us in positions where we must navigate challenges with grace, commitment, and adaptability. Whether it’s responding to a sudden setback at work, managing unexpected changes in a relationship, or simply staying balanced during a hectic day, these moments mirror the lessons of ukemi—the art of attacking and falling in Aikido.

Ukemi teaches us to engage fully without malice, to adapt without resistance, and to maintain balance even when things don’t go as planned. It also teaches resilience: the ability to get back up after you fall. On the mat, ukemi shows us that falling isn’t failure—it’s an opportunity to rise again, stronger and more aware. Off the mat, ukemi reminds us that mistakes and unexpected outcomes are not obstacles but opportunities for growth.

Ukemi, which means “to receive,” carries a deeper lesson: to truly receive, you must first give. On the mat, uke gives energy through a real, genuine, committed attack—this is the gift that makes the technique possible. Ukemi is not about going through the motions or performing a half-hearted, mechanical gesture. It is about using heart/mind (kokoro, 心) clearly in delivering an honest, committed attack — a hold or strike that nage must respond to, one with energy and intent and that extends through the target. It is not just a burst of energy at the beginning and then a reliance on nage to keep things going, the intensity continues throughout.

This principle extends into daily life. To truly receive knowledge, support, or opportunities, we must first give our energy, attention, and commitment. Relationships flourish when we continuously give our presence and care, opening ourselves to receive trust and understanding in return. There are times in life—and on the mat—when pressing forward isn’t the answer. Falling, yielding, or stepping back is not defeat but a necessary adaptation that allows us to maintain balance and safety while creating space for growth. Ukemi reminds us that giving and receiving are not separate acts but part of the same continuous flow of energy.

Table of Contents

• Benefits in Daily Life

• Reflection of the Week:

  • The Art of Ukemi

  • Special Situations in Ukemi

    • Leading the Technique from Inside

    • "Bugger" Training: Active Resistance

  • How to Practice and Train

  • The Gift of Intoku: Acting Without Expectation

  • Wrap-Up

Reflection of the Week:

The Art of Ukemi

Ukemi can be misunderstood as either just going along with your partner (e.g. it’s “fake”) or actively resisting all of their efforts (e.g. making it “real on the street”). But true ukemi is neither of these. Instead, it is an expression of commitment, awareness, and balance. As uke, we are training Shinshin Toitsu Do just as much as when we are nage (perhaps even more deeply, but this article is long enough already before I dig into that), so let’s make sure we train with the same purpose.

The attack in ukemi starts from the right distance (maai, 間合い) and must be deliberate—committed but free of malice. A genuine attack is essential for nage to practice effectively. A shomenuchi strike, for instance, isn’t a tentative motion that stops at the forehead but rather extends fully through. A yokomenuchi strike or katatetori grab is not a static, lifeless movement, but one filled with intent, creating the necessary energy for nage to engage with the technique. This committed attack allows nage to experience the dynamics of a real encounter and engage with the technique fully, while uke remains present and aware, prepared to adapt to nage’s movement.

Uke must stay engaged throughout the technique, continuing to attack even as nage applies the technique. This means extending ki throughout the attack, maintaining posture, and staying connected to nage’s actions. Ukemi is dynamic and alive. Some uke may approach practice as though their role is to resist nage at every turn, to "win" by preventing the technique from succeeding. This mindset undermines the practice entirely.

Good ukemi is not about fighting back or trying to dominate nage. Uke must remain aware that nage could always respond unpredictably. For all uke knows, nage might not be a “nice” Ki Aikido person who loves and protects all creation and helps all things grow and develop. Uke cannot assume nage’s intent is always gentle or cooperative. Imagine a scenario where nage, instead of calmly applying the technique, turns and punches uke in the nose. This possibility should encourage uke to remain engaged, aware, and adaptable, rather than rigidly focused on stopping nage’s movement.

By trying to block or resist the technique completely, uke loses the opportunity to learn and places themselves at greater risk. A rigid attack is easily countered. Uke’s resistance creates openings for nage to exploit, leaving uke vulnerable. The best ukemi strikes a balance: giving a genuine, committed attack while staying aware, flexible, and ready to adapt to nage’s response.

There can also be a more subtle way that uke can disrupt nage’s technique: by mis-applying the Four Basic Principles of Ki Aikido. For example:

• “I’m just keeping one point” Uke uses the principle of Keep One Point as a justification for locking up into an immovable stance, becoming unresponsive to nage’s movements. While stability is important, Keeping One Point is not about becoming a statue, is about dynamic balance, not stagnation.

• “I’m just more relaxed” Uke claims to be Relaxing Completely, but it doing so they are actually collapsing their posture, shutting down the flow of energy and making it impossible for nage to engage with the technique (Dead Calmness, Teishi). True relaxation is alive and responsive, not limp or disengaged.

• “I’m just keeping weight underside” Uke claims to be Keeping Weight Underside as they anchor themselves heavily and refuses to move, making in impossible for nage to execute the technique. While it is important to be grounded, it must be paired with flexibility and adaptability.

• “I’m just extending ki” Uke may claim to be Extending Ki, but does so in a way that is rigid, overpowering, or not in accord with the technique being practiced, trying to dominate the interaction or is actually pulling Ki. True Ki Extension lets go of the need to control and allows us to be at ease.

These misapplications can create significant challenges during practice. However, it is important to acknowledge that correctly applying the Four Basic Principles is a difficult balancing act. Striking the right balance between stability and fluidity, commitment and adaptability, is something that takes consistent effort and reflection to achieve.

The fall in ukemi is not about giving up or anticipating but about maintaining balance in motion. Whether it’s a forward roll, backward roll, sliding fall, or even a break-fall the purpose is the same: to protect yourself while remaining engaged in the practice. Falling correctly isn’t losing your balance—it’s keeping it in motion.

Ukemi is not about being flashy. The goal is not to create an impressive roll or dramatic movement to draw attention to oneself. Instead, the movement should be natural, fluid, and in harmony with nage’s energy and direction. A flashy ukemi can distract from the technique and create unnecessary risks for both uke and nage.

Another critical aspect of ukemi is not anticipating nage’s actions. Unless specifically guiding a beginner nage (see special situations below), uke should follow nage’s lead while remaining fully engaged. Anticipating undermines nage’s technique, disrupts the flow of the practice, and can be dangerous. Stay present, stay connected, and allow nage to guide the interaction, adapting as needed to maintain safety and balance.

Ukemi is a profound gift of trust, and that trust must be accompanied by responsibility. When you entrust your body to nage, you are also entrusting them with your growth and safety. At the same time, by maintaining awareness and control, you ensure that you honor this trust while protecting both yourself and your partner.

Most importantly, a good uke must cultivate awareness and control. While it is vital to commit fully to the attack, uke must remain aware of the situation and able to adjust as needed. If nage becomes unbalanced, freezes mid-technique, or creates a dangerous situation, uke must be able to slow down, stop the attack, redirect to prevent harm, or just call out “STOP!” This balance of commitment and control ensures that both uke and nage can train safely and effectively.

Special Situations in Ukemi

While the foundational principles of giving a genuine attack, maintaining awareness, and practicing adaptability always apply, there are special situations where the role of uke requires additional nuance. Let’s explore two such situations:

Leading the Technique from Inside

When training with a nage who is less experienced in the technique being practiced, uke’s role often includes leading the technique from inside the technique. This means subtly guiding nage’s movement through your own energy, balance, and intent without taking over the technique or making it too easy.

For example, if nage hesitates or misdirects their movement, uke can gently adjust their own alignment or energy to “suggest” the proper flow of the technique. This might involve:

• Adjusting your fall to highlight where nage’s movement should lead.

• Providing consistent energy during the attack to make the pathway of the technique clearer.

• Maintaining clear ki extension and a balanced posture (shisei) to keep the interaction fluid and constructive.

The key is to guide without overshadowing. Your role is not to perform the technique for nage but to create an environment where they can learn and discover it themselves. Think of it as being a supportive partner who provides structure while allowing nage to find their way.

This approach requires sensitivity, awareness, and humility. It’s a subtle art, but when done well, it greatly enhances the learning process for nage and builds trust between partners.

"Bugger" Training: Active Resistance

Sometimes, it can be both fun and useful to practice with a more active, resistant uke—a type of training sometimes referred to informally as "bugger training." This involves uke introducing controlled resistance or unpredictability during the interaction, challenging nage to adapt dynamically to the situation.

This type of training can be invaluable for nage to:

• Sharpen their technique.

• Learn to maintain composure and adaptability under pressure.

• Explore how to flow with an unpredictable or resistant uke.

However, bugger training is not appropriate for every situation. Before engaging in this type of practice, consider the following:

• Consent: Both you and nage must agree to this type of training. Resistance is only useful when it is invited and understood by both partners. Unsolicited resistance can disrupt practice and lead to frustration or injury.

• Comfort and Experience: Both you and nage should be very comfortable with the technique being practiced, as well as with the ukemi required. If nage or uke is still learning the basics, active resistance can create confusion and hinder progress.

• Balance of Resistance: The resistance should be realistic and constructive, not combative or overwhelming. The goal is to challenge nage without shutting down the interaction entirely.

When practiced thoughtfully, this kind of training can be an exciting way to deepen your understanding of Aikido and test the adaptability of both uke and nage. It brings a dynamic edge to practice but requires mutual respect, clear communication, and appropriate timing.

How to Practice and Train

1. Learn to Fall Safely
   Practice falling and rolling until it becomes second nature. Forward rolls, backward rolls, and sliding falls are foundational techniques. Start slowly, focusing on protecting yourself, and gradually increase your comfort and proficiency. Once you are comfortable with these you can work on break-falls.

2. Understand the Attack
   Study the various forms of attack—shomenuchi, yokomenuchi, katatetori, etc.—and their proper execution. A committed attack is precise and continuous, not a hesitant motion that stops short or an uncontrolled lunge.

3. Embrace Giving and Receiving
   Approach each interaction with the mindset that giving and receiving are interconnected. Give your energy fully during the attack, and open yourself to receiving the experience of falling, learning, and adapting.

4. Maintain Awareness and Control
   Stay alert during the technique. If nage loses control or the technique becomes unsafe, be prepared to slow or stop your attack to ensure safety. Awareness is a critical part of your role as uke. Just as nage maintains connection continuously with uke before, during, and between techniques, so to does uke maintain intense connection with nage before, during, and between techniques.

5. Balance Commitment and Safety
   Protect yourself by probing for openings and maintaining adaptability, even as you give nage the energy they need to perform the technique. Remember, ukemi is not submission—it’s an active, engaged practice of balance and awareness.

6. Reflect on your Ukemi
   Take time to evaluate your own habits and tendencies.
   Ask yourself:

   • Do I collapse or flop around, making it hard for nage to practice effectively?

   • Do I often stop people from completing their techniques?

   • Is it difficult for me to find training partners, do people avoid training with me, and could my ukemi be contributing to this?

   Honest self-reflection can reveal patterns that may need adjustment and set the foundation for meaningful improvement.

7. Solicit Feedback from Partners and Teachers
   Others often notice aspects of our practice that we miss ourselves. By asking training partners and teachers for feedback, we gain valuable insights into how we can refine our ukemi. Be open to constructive criticism and use it as a tool for growth.

The Gift of Intoku: Acting Without Expectation

Good ukemi is a method of walking the path of the Universe, and of leading others along that path. When you give the gift of ukemi to your partner, you offer them the energy and commitment necessary for growth, without seeking recognition or reward. By giving fully, you create the space to receive the invaluable lessons ukemi offers.

When we give our best to our relationships, work, and communities without expectation, we open ourselves to receiving growth, connection, and fulfillment in return. Mistakes and setbacks, like falls, become opportunities to refine ourselves and deepen our understanding of the world.

Wrap-Up

Ukemi is not just a physical practice of falling safely—it’s a way of living that embodies the heart of Shinshin Toitsu Do. On the mat, it fosters growth, trust, and mutual understanding between uke and nage. Off the mat, it teaches us how to face life’s challenges with grace and resilience.

Good ukemi requires balance: providing genuine, committed energy while remaining adaptable and aware. It’s about creating the intent and energy needed for our partner to train effectively without shutting them down.

Ukemi teaches us that falling is not failing. Each fall is an opportunity to rise again stronger and wiser, to learn, and to grow. Ukemi gives us the opportunity to continuously refine our understanding and application of Shishin Toitsu Do through the Four Basic Principles, Heart/Mind/Kokoro, Shisei, Shisen, and Maai.

Let’s approach each interaction, both on and off the mat, with the energy, awareness, and grace that ukemi teaches us.

Upcoming Events

January 10 - 12, 2025 EKF New Year’s Seminar “Shugyo Tassai Kigan Shiki”
Northern Virginia Ki Aikido in Merrifield, Virginia
Special banquet on Saturday night, January 11th starting at 5:00pm celebrating Bob Gardner Sensei ($40 additional fee for banquet).
Registration Link (early registration closes 12/20/24)
Payment Link

July 24 - 27, 2025 International Ki Conference taught by Kaicho Shinichi Tohei Sensei
Furman University in Greenville, South Carolina
https://internationalkiconference2025.com/

I look forward to seeing you on the mat (and in daily life) soon!